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5 Things We Didn’t Have Growing Up And Didn’t Miss One Bit

Growing up in the 80s and 90s, many of us remember a time when life seemed simpler, less cluttered by technology and consumerism. As parents today navigate the world of parenting with a plethora of gadgets, apps, and trends, it’s worth reflecting on what we didn’t have as children and how those absences shaped us. Surprisingly, many of us didn’t miss these things at all. Here’s a look at some of those items and experiences that were absent from our childhoods but didn’t seem to hinder our development one bit.

Smartphones

A mother engaging with her teenage son holding a smartphone outdoors.
Photo by Kindel Media

Perhaps the most significant difference between our childhoods and those of today’s children is the absence of smartphones. Back then, communication was primarily face-to-face or through landline phones. We had to plan meet-ups in advance, and if we were late, we simply had to deal with it.

For parents today, the idea of their child being unreachable for an extended period might seem daunting. But many of us thrived without constant connectivity. We learned to rely on our instincts, navigate our neighborhoods, and solve problems independently. Instead of being glued to screens, we were outside playing, exploring, and learning the value of patience.

Social Media

Another thing we didn’t have growing up was social media. While platforms like Instagram and TikTok dominate the lives of today’s kids, we formed friendships, shared experiences, and expressed ourselves in the real world. We wrote notes to our friends, passed them in class, and created memories that weren’t curated for an audience.

Without the pressure of likes and followers, we developed a sense of self that wasn’t influenced by online validation. Today’s parents can reflect on this and consider ways to encourage genuine connections for their kids, perhaps by fostering environments where friendships are built through face-to-face interaction rather than digital approval.

Streaming Services

In our childhood, we didn’t have the luxury of binge-watching entire seasons of shows on demand. Instead, we eagerly awaited our favorite shows to air each week, making it a collective experience with family or friends. Saturday morning cartoons were a highlight of the week, and we cherished every moment spent watching them.

Today, parents can encourage their children to experience the joy of anticipation by creating family movie nights or regular TV show viewing sessions. This not only fosters connection but teaches children the value of waiting and savoring experiences rather than rushing through them.

Video Games

While video games were present in our childhoods, they were far less sophisticated than today’s offerings. We played outside more, engaged in imaginative play, and used our creativity to entertain ourselves. Today’s children have access to immersive gaming experiences, but this can sometimes limit their engagement with the world around them.

Parents might consider setting limits on screen time and encouraging outdoor play or creative activities, allowing children to explore their interests without the constant lure of video games. This could help them discover new hobbies and foster a sense of adventure.

Physical Books vs. E-Readers

In our formative years, physical books were our primary source of knowledge and entertainment. We didn’t have e-readers or tablets, but we cherished the feel of turning pages and getting lost in stories. Bookstores and libraries were our sanctuaries, and we delighted in the tactile experience of reading.

Encouraging a love for physical books in today’s digital age can be a challenge, yet it is crucial. Parents can create cozy reading nooks, participate in local library programs, and set aside dedicated reading time. These practices can instill a lasting appreciation for literature in their children.

The Lack of Instant Gratification

Growing up without the internet meant that we had to wait for information. If we had a question, we either looked it up in a library or asked someone who might know. Today, children have instant access to information at their fingertips, but this can lead to a diminished ability to engage in deep thinking and critical analysis.

Parents can use this to their advantage by encouraging thoughtful discussions and research projects that require more than a quick Google search. This approach helps children develop critical thinking skills and patience in their quest for knowledge.

Less Stuff, More Experiences

In our childhoods, consumer culture wasn’t as pervasive as it is today. We often played with simple toys or made our fun. Our birthdays were celebrated with fewer presents but more emphasis on experiences—like going to the park or having a picnic with friends.

Today, parents can shift their focus from material gifts to creating memorable experiences. Whether it’s family outings, DIY projects, or community events, fostering experiences over things can lead to stronger family bonds and lasting memories.

The Freedom to Explore

Lastly, many of us grew up with a sense of freedom that allowed us to roam our neighborhoods, explore the outdoors, and even get into a little trouble now and then. We learned about boundaries and consequences through our experiences, rather than through structured playdates and constant supervision.

Parents today might feel hesitant to allow their children the same freedom, but granting them opportunities to explore can foster independence and self-reliance. Establishing safe boundaries while allowing kids the freedom to venture out can help them build confidence and resilience.

As we reflect on what we didn’t have growing up, it’s essential to recognize that these absences didn’t detract from our childhoods; they shaped us into who we are today. By thoughtfully considering what we can learn from our past, we can help guide our children toward a balanced, fulfilling upbringing—one that values genuine connection, creativity, and independent exploration.

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